Archive for the Living Category

CSL Files 217, [2.03] After thought

Posted in Cabo San Lucas, Celebrations, Depression, Grief, Living, Lulu Island, Music, OCD, Pain, Richmond, The Path with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on February 14, 2010 by Erikakw

“They say the Irish are head strong. But I prefer to say heart strong. I’ve never been to Ireland but my name, Maude-Regan is pure Irish! I figure that is why I always have little ditties playing in my head that I want to rhyme together into lyrics because I can hear music playing buried deep inside from ancestors past. I think there is physical genetic rendering, music is in the Irish”

My after thought is: music and love go together they are of the same substance. That’s why people fall in deeper love when they remember a song connected to a particular memory of meeting a special someone. You may fall in love with a person, fall in love with your work, or the geography and culture of where you live.

In studying physics I have come to understand the most important thing is to embrace contradiction and chaos. Since we would rather move away from c & c like a magnet in the opposite direction the interesting thing is, if we pay close attention—we are drawn back to the thing we are moving away from.

“Know that I’m not talking about erotic, romantic love but the substance, the matter in you and me that keeps us living and taking breaths everyday that drives you like an olympic athlete to the gold

When I came home from Cabo San Lucas I began to notice fear and anxiety loosening its hold on me. I accepted my perceived failures with new found delight and recycled all the past with the present to make something new

I guess that’s what love can do turn things old to new”

Post 200 ~ 19 years of smiles

Posted in Children, OCD, Youth with tags , , , , , , , , on January 21, 2010 by Erikakw

at the end of a long chapter its funny how all the good rises to the surface in the wake of my Joshua turning 19 it seems and feels like more than a page has turned

you are the consummate mr smiley jkothephotoguy

who likes all things different you watch clouds wait for the clearing and then mark your time by reciting scripts from movies repeating words and choruses and printing in your cryptic way

so many years ago now you came along yet before you were born I gave you back to G-d, to the universe while I was sitting at the North Shore Studios in North Vancouver I would take two buses and a sea bus every day and you would be my companion hidden away

this day you are handsome tall and all smile Im remembering that you love dragonflies enchanted by bees and eggs to boot then all of a sudden you started to collect loot there were times of exhaustion times where I along with you we near you thought we would lose our minds and our selves all together we did not know how to live the autistic way so we molded ourselves to you and you to us and somehow we worked it all out with many people too many to mention in this post

slowly and faster you began to grow now you are the life of the party always have been as you have interpreted the world through a lens so fine in a zone that none of us have known yet we struggle to own our life that would not be as good as yours without you in ours

in between the folds pressure mounts try to fit the pieces of a life all together strain to learn the way to go let you learn in the moment and relearn how to do absolutely everything from scratch until it becomes a script then you memorize the steps the way forward in your innocent gentle way with a slice of sneaky pesky abilities amidst the disabilities you are not shy or sly but earnest and good—looking for all things yellow or white hoping to find at Garry a kite a bird a boat or plane

this is you of jko fame…..

A Liger’s Tale, v. Rhea’s footnote

Posted in Animals, Apprentice, Cats, Chronos, Genetics, Metallurgy, The Path with tags , , , on January 12, 2010 by Erikakw

“Another day was rolling out before her [Kiera]. She faced it with the same giddy determination that she always had, even if it meant being callow~coming down a little more heavily on the side of immaturity. Scatty, kind, heedless, carefree; informal, flaky yet, responsible, in control of, at the helm, accountable and answerable, sweet, gullible, honest, overtrusting and dupable she journeyed head on into the hour after midnight expecting that an hour would feel like a thousand years.”~Rhea Phoenix

Imashing

Posted in 21st century, Alchemy, Apprentice, Art, Artists, Chronos, Dance, Kairos, Living, quotidian, Sculpture, Steveston, Story, The Path, Wild Flower with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 8, 2009 by Erikakw

“Me…. I live for imagination in my dreaming. I’m looking to re-generate my imagination to use it for Good for people, for community, for telling stories, because I have to.  Mixing and matching and mashing, collaging my way to the end, that’s my thing. That’s re-generation how the rest happens is mystery–Rhea Phoenix for salonunidad

Triple D

Posted in 21st century, Chronos, Depression, Kairos, Living, OCD, quotidian, Steveston, Story with tags , , , , , , , , , , on December 2, 2009 by Erikakw

not DQ dessert not sweet nor fruity

not Purdy’s dark orange liqueur nor Japanese brandy early

neither here or either there

still empty soundless white grey space

for acedia’s depression becomes obsession

without a face we lose our place

on our knees in the deepest darkest dungeon

enter into the labyrinth of despair

circling wildly hopelessly in prayer

crying and speaking that we might be heard

now

Posted in 21st century, Art, Artists, Living, quotidian, Steveston, Story, The Desert, The Path with tags , , , , , , , on November 30, 2009 by Erikakw

there

is no easy

if it pleases
you

try to come
to terms with

life being unfair
most of the time

work with that
find a way

perhaps this day

CSL Files 217, [1.01] The sun from the south

Posted in Chronos, Depression, Grief, Kairos, La amistad, Living, Pain, quotidian, Steveston, Story, The Sea with tags , , , , , , , , , on November 3, 2009 by Erikakw

Brighter days lay ahead, even in November….

The sun from the south beckons many. A place such as Cabo San Lucas. It hasn’t been too long now that I dreamt I went there myself. Yet the only thing I can remember at this hour in the afternoon is the glass bottom boat and while peering into the bottom of the one we sailed in to view the fantastic sea life below, I looked closer than I had ever looked before, there on the ocean floor, was my compass….

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